2025 another year leaving...

I want to have a summary of 2025, let's see what i could find as positive & negative feelings:

Pros 2025:

New Job

New experience ( i could not image i can start a new professional job)

went to kenya

visited Dubai 3 times

saw my best friend 4 times this year

went to Djanet twice 

received an african dress and a traditinal clothes from Djanet

enjoyed music festival all summer

spent quality time with my parents

went playing with my nephews

walked a 10km race

cooked almost everyday for my parents

became the queen of brownies

did some crochet bags

get back to the gym

have seen many friends from polytech

loved too much

Cons 2025:

Lost my best friend +20 years

stopped the gym for almost 6 months

did not have the heartful experience on my second trip to djanet

was not able to maintain my thyroid levels to a stable number

could not focus on my self

emotionally depended

cried enough to fill up a whole dam

not a big fan of meeting people in real life

adopted remote work too often

unable to have a healthy eating routine

loved too much

feeling that i am closing myself to the world

not interested in anything

moody on daily basis

i don't know if these are all of them, i know that life is about ups and downs and anytime any day Elhamdoullah, God knows us and knows what is best for us!

I even don't have anything to wish for 2026 allah ydjib elkheir.. this is it!!

حياتي غرامي حنو عليا شويا شويا

 حياتي غرامي حنو عليا شويا شويا

هذي اغنية من تيناريوان،غنوهالي مرة ولسقت فيا

في هذا العام الفارط وليت نكتب بالعربية ماشي الفصحة، الدارجة ،ماشي لأني نحب اللغة بصح لحب شخص ما.

بصح بعد عام انحس انو حبو ليا نقص ولا حبي ليه زاد.

في كيلا الحالات الوقت ابدل كل شيء بصح اغنية تيناريوان مازالها في بالي.

أنا نمشي في هاذا الدنيا بقلبي حتى َ ان دخلني في كثر من حيط بصح مانعرفش مانتبعوش، ندعي ربي القوة باش نقابل هذاك الحيط ونكمل طريقي.

انا نحب الحب و انحب نحب و نفرح الناس.

بصح هذي الدنيا واعرة مع المشاعر و الاحساس،

Be Yourself always and everyday!!

 I have been part of the African Startup conference this week, it was a nice opportunity for my company to approach leader operators and show them what we are able to do.

this exercise require a lot of social energy, welcoming people, smiling to them, explaining what we do, asking the right questions to see how we could fit in their ecosystem, exchanging numbers or contact and hoping to be able to build something together in the future.

In the same time this is an opportunity to meet my mates, people from my university that i did not have the chance to keep in touch on daily bases, and these are my chargers, as draining it can be in an event to talk to people the moment i meet someone from polytech i feel plugged and charging energy. honestly i cannot explain it.

I have met my twiny in the name and in the university and after a long talk we realized that we went through few difficulties even if we were quite far from each others. and this was the most amazing feeling. i heard a sentence this week saying may be God is using you to make people happy and help them to be better, and this person healed a part of my pain and helped me to face a fear i never expressed.

Life is made in a weird way, i have been known as a joyful full of energy person in the university and even after, so everyone remembers my voice, my smile my energy i feel like a hurricane when i arrive somewhere, when i see my self right now, when i realize that i just want a quiet place with the loved one, i feel i have changed or may be i just need to co-exist with both version.

being under the spotlight eats a lot of energy and recharging can be in different ways: being loved, being appreciated, or being alone and focusing on every breath.

when it get too loud i just close and be me, quieter but still nice and smiling.

!i guess you got it we are several in me , let's see how lucky you can get and who can face you hihihii!

Healing system

 I went to djanet to heal my self, to feel good with myself

this time was hard, Tadrart was a second visit yet it seemed to be different, the group was nice and may be i should have taken time to know each one and connect but i had big frustration and couldn't, what i did is hide behind my camera, i have taken so many pictures and when i reviewed them and posted them on instagram, i could feel my distance my sad feeling my distraction.

i was thinking that the moment i could feel sand under my feet i would be healed, and actually no, it takes time it takes energy.

i love djanet, i think i need to revist sefar, for a real silenced feeling

i don't have much to say yet i think i need more time to put words on what is hurting

let's see!!

In Love with him!!

 To you the soul who took my heart, 

you the one who saw my soul, and my mind

you the one that will never read these words, 

you the one who taught me that is useless to worry for everything, and it is better to keep your energy for happy moments,

you the one who made me appreciate tea without mint, rock music in tamashek and who pushed me to learn guitare.

you the man in blue, you the free man or the man in my heart.

maybe somedays our path may be separated, and i am not ready for that.

all what i can say: ariki houlan houlan

Writing with AI

 Today, i had an interesting experience, i have asked chatgpt to define a viral linkedin post. i have received as an answer a list of 7 topics that could go viral on the net, and even how to develop them.

Then He or It asked me if i want a draft of a viral style linkedin either on my telecom/training expertise or a personnal/human storytelling. obviously i have asked for both.

And what to say about the result... it was perfect, i felt i could have written this in a less perfect way in a less waw result, in the same time i realized that most linkedin posts are AI generated, now to be honest i do use AI to re write my emails (most of the time)you could see even here in my blog i do mistakes while typing , but the essence of the email is from me, are my words.

is it fair to be strong on a platform by using AI, i can see those coming saying that of course AI is a tool and being strong by using the right tools is perfectly normal, yet where is our own touch?

will i write a post or a blog using AI of course no, even if blogger is suggesting that i could use the new beta feature, i am not interested, i write to express my self, i write to heal myself i write because this is an exercise that i enjoy.

i would never fight AI, i will always use it to help on my daily tasks but i cannot present a work done by AI and consider it as mine.

I love to see a personal touch in everything, this is me!!!

June 9th 2025

 a date to remember!!

as special as October 7th was, June 9th is important.

when you bring food to a sick person you might be intercepted, arrested or kidnapped by the IOF!!! on international waters.

what is this? the freedom flotilla have been stopped on its route to gaza, bringing food to starving people, to break the siege around Gaza and save the humans there.

what are we doing on the other side of the world? what am i doing? scrolling in a sick way, checking on them, then living my life, drinking coca cola? no that i have stopped but i can see it in some many places i get sick.

what if we get out of the bubble that we have constructed around us, and see what is our impact on this awful situation, yes we cannot all fly to egypt, but how about stop using anything that can hurt the Palestinians.

• McDonald’s-- hichem cook is your best friend

• Coca Cola-- hamoud or how about you eat a fruit

• Burger King-- House of burger is available in many cities

• Papa John’s- mega pizze/liverpool

• Pizza Hut-- again mega pizza/liverpool

• Domino's Pizza again again mega pizza/liverpool

• axa - SAA/Caat/caar/Gam

• HP--Lenovo

 just do something!!

Crying as a response... will consume me!!!

 I don't cry in important moments, funerals or any sad moments with family etc... but i cry if someone would say a thing that would push me away, i cry when i talk to myself and i feel lost, i cry when i am scared to end up alone.

we have been told that crying would wash our eyes, and i repeat this to myself, but i know inside of me that if i cry it means something is broken.

sometimes i don't find the right words to answer to express, and it is ok, i am learning to think and understand before to react but my tears are always ready unfortunately to show off to run down my face, to be honest i feel good after crying out but sometimes i think i should be stronger, anyways, i will never be perfect but i learn everyday! 

Palestine - who is the hero?

 i have worked for big companies, for more than 18 years, these companies were known internationally for their values, the first one was Chinese so basically, if you have an idea about Chinese culture that was the predominancy, we did not have much room about inclusion or diversity, unless if you are a customer ( let me say that in the last 4 years their behavior has changed since they needed to be implemented in more countries). But then the second one is European, with high values, all about inclusion and diversity, then October 7th happened, and somehow the inclusion and diversity was not about Palestinian, it was never about Gaza, and i started asking myself, if i do boycott big companies of food and clothing etc.. how can i boycott my company? should i leave my work? and tried to have discussion like this with people around me, and most of the feedback i have got were it is the same everywhere unless you will work for a local company.

so i started hating myself, because my company did not reach to my values, and seeing ibtihal today facing her boss, exposing him, putting everything at risk i felt ashamed, i don't work for Microsoft but i worked for a company that did not recognize Palestine, or Palestinians, and that disturbed me a lot, having the courage to put your life in God's hand is the highest proof of courage someone can show. (btw i have left that company)

We won't lose anything when we are on the right side.

If government force out any company working against Palestinians we might have a big impact.   

I have no idea how politics work, but i know that people movement can never stay unnoticed.

I don't write when i am happy?

 it has been awhile, and somehow i feel ashamed for not writing for such a long time, but it seems that when i feel good, i feel happy i don't get the urge to put down words.

elhamdoullah, the last three months have been full of change, new job, two trips, attending some concerts, taking care of my spirits in ramadhan, 

if i have to be 100% honest , i was not happy all the time, during ramadhan i was scared to lose my mind once again, and get lost, it needed a lot of discipline to be able to feel ok everyday, still from time to time i had that loneliness poping up and reminding me that there is no miracle.

anyways life is about challenges and pushing myself to be better, let's work on it!!